I have a friend I really adore but he lives in another country and when he is in my country he lives over 1K miles away. I have known him since childhood. We chat regularly online almost never through voice although he offers to call me from time to time. I am so backwards. I just wish I could express how I enjoy our friendship to him but I am so afraid of scaring him away and I so value our friendship. He is coming to my part of the world in a few weeks and wants to share dinner. I am so nervous I so don’t want to him feel anything he doesn’t want. But I am such a transparent person in person he just might see how much I value our friendship without me having to say a word. I just wish he’d voice his feeling in a clear way not in ways that leave me trying to interpret what he is saying. Maybe he is afraid of scaring me away.
He always greets me with a kiss on the forehead, a gentle, loving, enduring kiss on the forehead. I love when he kisses me on my forehead. The perfect kiss, on the forehead!
Maybe I should pray for a sign . . . Or maybe I should just leave well enough alone and rejoice I have a friend I adore and we share some awesome conversation through chat. But I want so much more. . . Oh the dilemma what to do.